Good Good Father by Pastor Abidan Paul Shah

GOOD GOOD FATHER by Pastor Shah, Clearview Church, Henderson

goodgoodfatherIntroduction: This weekend I’m preaching the second message in our new series on the Trinity called “BATTLE OF THE GODS.” We’re going to focus on the nature of the first person of the godhead – God the Father. The message is titled “GOOD GOOD FATHER.” It will not only help us understand God the Father better but also help all men who are fathers to have a better understanding of their role.

John 5   19 Then Jesus answered and said to them, “Most assuredly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of Himself, but what He sees the Father do; for whatever He does, the Son also does in like manner. 20 For the Father loves the Son, and shows Him all things that He Himself does; and He will show Him greater works than these, that you may marvel. 21 For as the Father raises the dead and gives life to them, even so the Son gives life to whom He will.”

Father Knows Best

Father Knows Best

Family Matters

Family Matters

Bridge: Where do you think most people in America/West get their understanding of what it means to be a father/dad? Television. Would you agree that the image and respect for fathers has been steadily declining since the early days of TV? We’ve come a long ways since Jim Anderson on “Father Knows Best” or even Carl Winslow on “Family Matters.” For the past 20-25 years fathers on TV are portrayed more and more as incompetent, clueless, out of touch, wimpy, rude, crude, and everything that is contrary to what a dad is supposed to be. It’s as if the definition, the position, or the calling of fatherhood is being redefined. Today’s message will help us become better fathers ourselves to our children by patterning ourselves after God the Father.

Some Questions: What comes to your mind when you think of God the Father? What do you think about the relationship between God the Father and God the Son? I know these are some deep questions about the Trinity that you may not have examined before but here are some questions closer to home. Men – What is your understanding of being a good father? Do you think you’ve been a good dad? Ladies – don’t think that this message is only for the men. Some of you have been interfering and sabotaging the role that God has called your husband to play and it needs to stop. Children – some of you have been bitter with your dads for the right or the wrong reasons. Today God wants to bring healing in your relationships. Are you saved? Have you been to the Son?

Let’s answer the question – “What does it mean to be a ‘Good Good Father’ like our Heavenly Father?”

I. BE THE INITIATOR AND THE PATTERN SETTER.

19 Then Jesus answered and said to them, “Most assuredly, I say to you, the Son can do nothing of Himself, but what He sees the Father do; for whatever He does, the Son also does in like manner.”

Background: In this verse Jesus not only gave us a glimpse into His relationship with His Father but also laid out a general principle regarding fatherhood. I know some of our translations have the Son and the Father capitalized as if Jesus was only talking about the Trinity but many scholars believe that it could also be “a typical son” with a small “s” and “a typical father” with a small “f.” In other words, what Jesus was saying is that both in the Trinity as well as in everyday life it is the Father/father who is the initiator and the pattern setter for the children to follow. Listen again – “the Son can do nothing of Himself, but what He sees the Father do; for whatever He does, the Son also does in like manner.”

Men – If you are a father, just like God the Father in the Trinity, you have been assigned by God to be the initiator and the pattern setter in your house. You’ll have to learn from God the Father what it means to be a good initiator and a good pattern setter in your home. Just the way God the Father decreed to create the world and initiated the plan of salvation for sinful humanity, you have to be the creator and initiator of all good things in your family. Unfortunately, in many homes, it is not the man but the poor wife who is playing the initiator and pattern setter for spirituality and everything positive while the man is busy chasing the dollar or sprawled out in front of the TV or out in the garage messing with the vehicles or feeding some habit or hobby. Men – the status of your home is contingent on you. Someone might say – “I’ve tried but it’s always a fight.” I understand that sometimes it can be that way but you can’t give up. Just as a drill sergeant cannot give up on his troop and a coach cannot give up on his team, you cannot give up on your role as the initiator and pattern setter in your household.

Where do you begin? The first place to begin is by rejecting bad patterns of fatherhood in your life. Men – we admire certain men in our lives. Sometimes it’s through personal relationships like fathers, grandfathers, uncles, bosses, supervisors, superior officers, teachers, instructors, coaches, etc. These are people in our lives who have helped us and made a big impact upon us. We respect them and we try to do everything like them, even how we raise our children. If they were wonderful fathers, then great. If not, that can be a huge mistake. Sometimes these men are not personally related to us. We admire them for being successful businessmen, athletes, actors, musicians or some superstar. We idolize such men to the point of emulating them in how they raised their children. We feel that we have to do everything just like them. Now if they were wonderful fathers, then wonderful. If not, that can be a huge mistake. Also, please don’t listen to every parenting seminar and bible study that comes along. Some are unhealthy, legalistic, and unbiblical. In recent years we have seen the fruit of some of this mess.

Application: Men – Are you being the initiator and the pattern setter in your home? You want your children to be good, are you following Jesus Christ? You want the children to be in church, are you in church? If you make fun of the church members and constantly criticize the pastor, don’t expect your children to do any different. Are you following God the Father as your pattern or do you have the wrong pattern?

II. SHOW LOVE IN DIFFERENT WAYS.

20 “For the Father loves the Son and shows Him all things that He Himself does…”

Background: You may not know that this is the second time in John’s Gospel that this statement is made. The first time was in John 3:35 “The Father loves the Son, and has given all things into His hand.” The first one in John 3:35 is about trust and the second in John 5:20 is about knowledge. Something more interesting here – two different Greek words are used for love in these two almost identical statements. In John 3:35 the word for love is “agapan” and in John 5:20 the word for love is “filein.” Any significance? In the first one the Father is telling the Son that He loves Him enough to trust everything over to Him. In the second one the Father is telling the Son that He loves Him enough to reveal everything about Himself to Him. I know some of y’all are wondering – “What does all this mean?” Just like God the Father showed love towards His Son in different words and different ways, so also we can show love to our children in different words and different ways. Men – There is no set way to show love to your children as long as they know you love them.

Illustration: After Rebecca was born I was scared to death about being a father. Even though I had a good father, I also saw that he was not always perfect. Also I had seen many not so good fathers. I wanted to be the best dad that I could be to her and for any who would come after her. So I began to check books out of the library and buy books on being a good father. Even though I was young, only 21 years of age, I could tell that many of the books were only promoting certain personality traits of the writers rather than the core values of fatherhood. For example, some portrayed dad as being a super masculine outdoorsy type, laying down the law for his kids, making them toe the line. Others portrayed dad as a counselor who is always sensitive to the emotions of his kids and understand where they were coming from. Which one is a better father? Neither. You need both. Sometimes you have to lay down the law and other times you have to sit there and listen. Some men are gruffer and others are mellower. Being gruff does not make you a bad father and being mellow does not make you a good father. These models are more personality traits rather core values. The main point is that as fathers we need to show love in different ways as the occasion demands.

Application: Do you understand the love of the Father towards the Son? Do you show love to your children in different ways as the occasion demands? Are you holding on to some grudge against your father because he did not follow a certain trait, because he did not show up for every game you played? Did you forget that he was there when you had your wreck? Did you forget that he was there when you were sick?

III. RAISE YOUR KIDS TO SURPASS YOU.

20 “…and He will show Him greater works than these, that you may marvel. 21 For as the Father raises the dead and gives life to them, even so the Son gives life to whom He will.”

Background: This is a deep statement here. What Jesus is saying here is that the Father has done great things but now He wants to show His Son even greater things so that the onlookers would marvel. The Father raises the dead and gives life to them but the Son will give life to whom He will, dead or alive. In other words, it is one thing to bring a physically dead person to life. It’s quite another to bring a physically living but spiritually dead person to life. Listen 3 verses later to John 5   24 “Most assuredly, I say to you, he who hears My word and believes in Him who sent Me has everlasting life, and shall not come into judgment, but has passed from death into life. 25 Most assuredly, I say to you, the hour is coming, and now is, when the dead will hear the voice of the Son of God; and those who hear will live.” Isn’t God the Father so humble and generous?!! He didn’t limit the work of Jesus but He gave Him the authority and power to surpass Him.

How did Jesus handle all this authority and power? 30 “I can of Myself do nothing. As I hear, I judge; and My judgment is righteous, because I do not seek My own will but the will of the Father who sent Me.” In other words, the Father honored the Son by giving Him greater authority and power and the Son in turn acknowledged how much more He was depended on the Father.

Application: What would happen if our families were to operate by such divine principles? What would happen if fathers all across America began to model themselves after our Heavenly Father? What would happen if children began to honor their fathers as God the Son honored His Father?

Our culture is struggling with the absence of fathers in the home. Many homes have fathers but they are not leading, as they should. Sometimes they are not being allowed to lead. Dads need to declare with Joshua in Joshua 24:15 “And if it seems evil to you to serve the LORD, choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods which your fathers served that were on the other side of the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you dwell. But as for me and my house, we will serve the LORD.”

For those whose fathers checked out, God the Father stepped in for you. Forgive those who failed and look to your Heavenly Father.

Are you saved? You cannot come to the Father unless you come to the Son first

DADS WANTED PART 2

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DADS WANTED – 2 by Pastor Shah, Clearview Church, Henderson

dadswantedparttwoThis weekend we’re again taking a break from our ongoing series on the Sermon on the Mount and completing part two of our message – “DADS WANTED.” As I mentioned last week, this subject is very dear to my heart – more important than being a pastor, more important than being a bible teacher, and it comes next only to my relationship with my wife. It’s my calling to be a dad to my children.

Proverbs 4 10 Hear, my son, and receive my sayings, And the years of your life will be many. 11 I have taught you in the way of wisdom; I have led you in right paths. 12 When you walk, your steps will not be hindered, And when you run, you will not stumble. 13 Take firm hold of instruction, do not let go; Keep her, for she is your life.

Overall Background: 10 Hear, my son, and receive my sayings, And the years of your life will be many. As you know, King Solomon spoke these words to his son Rehoboam. He was teaching him wisdom in the form of proverbs. He was teaching him about long life, hard work, money, honesty, relationships, bad people, and on and on in the form of proverbs. People often ask me – “Aren’t Proverbs more like principles rather than promises? Aren’t they more like general descriptions of life rather than guarantees of blessings?” I often hear that and so I point them to Jeremiah 18:18 which says,“…for the law shall not perish from the priest, nor counsel from the wise, nor the word from the prophet…” There were 3 ways in which God spoke to His people – Law from the Priest, Counsel from the Wise, and Prophecy from the Prophet. They’re all equally important. Proverbs fall under the category of Counsel. Since the word of God endures forever, proverbs also endure forever. But, you have to study them carefully and contextually. You have to study them like diamonds in the rough. Before you can put them in a glass case, they have to be cleaned, cut, and polished. Then, they are worth in the thousands and even millions. So also with these Proverbs – when you truly understand them and apply them, you can wear them like a diamond ring and a gold necklace and they will bring you infinite value.

Last time we looked at the first 5 letters where Solomon warned his son to avoid the wrong crowd, learn to seek wisdom, be merciful and truthful in order to be successful, appreciate discipline, and have a godly heritage. In the remaining 5 letters, he will be teaching his son the dangers of bad company, how to exercise self-control, and (the last 3 letters) how to have a happy marriage.

I said it before and I’ll repeat it again – America is in a crisis today – the crisis of fatherhood. The reason our young people and even adults are doing the things they’re doing is because there is no male in their lives to instruct them, to correct them, and to be there for them. America desperately needs some Solomons.

Application: Are you being the dad you’re supposed to be for your children? Are you teaching them godly wisdom? Are you modeling a godly lifestyle? Are you saved?

Again, 5 Reasons Dads are wanted:

I. DADS ARE WANTED TO TEACH CHILDREN TO CHOOSE THE RIGHT PATH. 

Proverbs 4 10 Hear, my son, and receive my sayings…14 Do not enter the path of the wicked, And do not walk in the way of evil.

Background: The wicked have a path that has been used for centuries. Just like some of our interstates today are sitting on the wagon trails that were actually used by the Indians before them. For centuries people have been walking on those paths and now they have become trails and roads and interstates. So also the paths of the wicked – people have been walking a certain way for centuries and thus the way of evil.

Solomon warns his son – 15 Avoid it, do not travel on it; Turn away from it and pass on. 16 For they do not sleep unless they have done evil; And their sleep is taken away unless they make someone fall. 17 For they eat the bread of wickedness, And drink the wine of violence. 18 But the path of the just is like the shining sun, That shines ever brighter unto the perfect day. 19 The way of the wicked is like darkness; They do not know what makes them stumble.

Application: Dads – do you take the time to teach your children about dangers of the wicked path? Are you walking in the wicked path?

II. DADS ARE WANTED TO TEACH CHILDREN SELF-CONTROL. 

Background: Now Solomon is telling his son – “Son, you have an enemy and it is YOU!”

First enemy: YOUR HEART – 23 Keep your heart with all diligence, (Keep – mismar. It means a prison or standing guard.) For out of it spring the issues of life. As Jesus said in Matthew 15:19 19For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies.

Second enemy: YOUR MOUTH – 24 Put away from you a deceitful mouth, And put perverse lips far from you. As Jesus said in Matthew 15:11 11Not what goes into the mouth defiles a man; but what comes out of the mouth, this defiles a man.”

We shape our words and then our words shape us. If you don’t like where you are headed, change the way you talk. Many of us are speaking our world into existence.

Third enemy: YOUR EYES – 25 Let your eyes look straight ahead, And your eyelids look right before you. Jesus said in Matthew 6:22-23 22“The lamp of the body is the eye. If therefore your eye is good, your whole body will be full of light. 23But if your eye is bad, your whole body will be full of darkness. If therefore the light that is in you is darkness, how great is that darkness! Avoid looking at the forbidden fruit. That’s when Eve fell.

Fourth enemy: YOUR FEET – 26 Ponder the path of your feet, And let all your ways be established. 27 Do not turn to the right or the left; Remove your foot from evil.

Bottom line: Children have to be taught self-control and fathers are given that responsibility.

Application: Dads – Are you teaching your children to exercise self-control? Do you have self-control in your life? Remember – it is the fruit of the Spirit.

Now we come to the last 3 letters. They all address the same issue – Adultery. Would you agree that this is a big issue? Last week as I was looking at my newsfeed, I saw the headlines mega-church pastor resigns because of adultery. When I saw the name, my heart just sank. I couldn’t believe it. Not him. But sadly it was true. This subject is so important that Solomon devotes all 3 letters to it! Even though much of what he says overlaps, each letter has a distinct truth that needs to be emphasized.

III. DADS ARE WANTED TO TEACH CHILDREN THE DANGERS OF ADULTEROUS TALK. 

Proverbs 5 1 My son, pay attention to my wisdom; Lend your ear to my understanding, 2 That you may preserve discretion, And your lips may keep knowledge.

Background: Lips represent our words. Solomon is telling his son, “Watch out for your words.” In other words, “Don’t be impulsive and indiscreet in how you talk to the opposite sex.”

Did you know that most adulterous relationships begin not with the eyes but with the words? Something as seemingly harmless as “Boy, you look pretty. I hope your husband appreciates you.” Or for ladies – “If my husband was as nice as you…” Before you know it – there is an affair.

Who better to talk about this than Solomon! He had a way with words. He was a wordsmith. If you don’t believe that, read the Song of Solomon.

But there’s more – 3 For the lips of an immoral woman drip honey, And her mouth is smoother than oil; Meaning: Not only watch out for your own words but also watch out for the words of the immoral man or woman. They know how to use seductive words. Just like honey, their words our sticky and they fall one drop at a time (literally). They are relentless. Just like oil, her words are smooth and slippery.

Listen to what James 3:2 For we all stumble in many things. If anyone does not stumble in word, he is a perfect man, able also to bridle the whole body. Meaning: If we can control your words, we can control our actions.

Application: Dads – what kind of words do you use around your children? How do you talk to your wife, their mother? They’re learning. How you talk to people on the outside?

IV. DADS ARE WANTED TO TEACH CHILDREN THE DANGERS OF ADULTEROUS THOUGHTS.

Proverbs 6 20 My son, keep your father’s command, And do not forsake the law of your mother…24 To keep you from the evil woman, From the flattering tongue of a seductress. 25 Do not lust after her beauty in your heart, Nor let her allure you with her eyelids.

Background: Now Solomon is going a step beyond and talking about lust. It involves thinking and daydreaming about the other person. Now you are in dangerous territory. When you begin to entertain and picture yourself with that person, it’s a matter of time before you fall headfirst into adultery.

What is the antidote? Remember the consequences that will follow if you keep on that path. 26 For by means of a harlot A man is reduced to a crust of bread; And an adulteress will prey upon his precious life. 27 Can a man take fire to his bosom, And his clothes not be burned? 28 Can one walk on hot coals, And his feet not be seared? 29 So is he who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; Whoever touches her shall not be innocent. 32 Whoever commits adultery with a woman lacks understanding; He who does so destroys his own soul. 33 Wounds and dishonor he will get, And his reproach will not be wiped away. 34 For jealousy is a husband’s fury; Therefore he will not spare in the day of vengeance.

Think about the consequences of adultery – destroy your marriage, destroy your children, destroy your testimony, and destroy the work of the church.

Application: Dads – do you take the time to warn your children about the dangers of delving in lust? Is there lust in your heart? When was the last time you repented before God?

V. DADS ARE WANTED TO TEACH CHILDREN THE DANGERS OF ADULTEROUS TRAPS.

Proverbs 7 1 My son, keep my words, And treasure my commands within you…6 For at the window of my house I looked through my lattice, 7 And saw among the simple, I perceived among the youths, A young man devoid of understanding, 8 Passing along the street near her corner; And he took the path to her house 9 In the twilight, in the evening, In the black and dark night. 10            And there a woman met him, With the attire of a harlot, and a crafty heart. 11 She was loud and rebellious, Her feet would not stay at home. 12 At times she was outside, at times in the open square, Lurking at every corner. 13 So she caught him and kissed him…21 With her enticing speech she caused him to yield, With her flattering lips she seduced him. 22 Immediately he went after her, as an ox goes to the slaughter, Or as a fool to the correction of the stocks, 23 Till an arrow struck his liver. As a bird hastens to the snare, He did not know it would cost his life. 24 Now therefore, listen to me, my children; Pay attention to the words of my mouth: 25 Do not let your heart turn aside to her ways, Do not stray into her paths; 26 For she has cast down many wounded, And all who were slain by her were strong men. 27 Her house is the way to hell, Descending to the chambers of death.

No one wakes up one morning and says, “I’m going to commit adultery.” It’s a word here, a thought there, and a step taken towords sin. If you think it’s not going to happen to you, think again. You will have to decide in your heart where you stand with lust. If the most beautiful and compatible woman were to walk in this room, what will you do? What if you feel that this is the one that you were supposed to be with? What if you feel a connection? What if you feel that you can be yourself around this one? It’s the lie of the devil. You are like an ox going to the slaughter. Wake up!

We need fathers who will not only talk about these things to their children but also live it out before them. We need fathers who are born again Christians. We need fathers who live by the Holy Spirit. We need fathers who are obedient to Jesus Christ and his word. We need fathers who are about the mission that God has given them to seek and to save that which was lost. We need fathers after God’s own heart.

Are you the father? Are you saved?

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